Howdy Crew!

Before we begin I just want to touch base with everyone. How are you doing? Have you been keeping in touch with loved ones? Have you been making sure you take care of your mind, body, and spirit? Have you practiced any self-love activities today? If your answers are all in the positive range, please keep up the good work. Also please check in with your loved ones that you know are struggling. If your answers are in the negative range, please take a moment do 1 simple act of kindness for yourself. I’ll be here when you get back, so no worries. Your well being is as important as anyone’s. #Alonetogether #selflove

Quarantine Challenge Project #10: Deity – Inner Goddess

Another day, another project. This one is a little bit different than all the others. This came to me in a dream. The other night I was having a really grotesque nightmare. I don’t remember what it was about, and quite frankly I don’t want to remember. All I know it was not something you would want your worst enemy to envision. Nightmares are not a new thing for me. They can range from varying horrors, such as regular getting lost in the woods to butchering random people. My nightmares get dark, violent, and unnatural.

Why am I telling you this? Because I want you to understand where my work comes from. When I tap into my raw mental state, things get scary. I don’t always let people see my raw emotions that I lay out on paper, but I am slowly learning that it is ok. Maybe someone seeing my work feels some sort of connection and realize that they are not as alone as they think. I know I needed that when I was growing up.

However, the dream I had the other night started out as a nightmare but then grew into a calm dreamless sleep. I couldn’t figure out how that happened when I first woke up. So after letting the pup out and then stumbling back into bed, I had a more vivid dream about what happened. I saw my demon trying to drag me back into the darkness, and then a light came from my center. It was this warrior Goddess that was so calm and peaceful and made me feel warm and safe. She cut the hold that the demon had over me and swept me up in her light. I knew she was telling me what had happened earlier in the night, because I felt that same peaceful, dreamless calm. I could not get it out of my head. So I knew I had to bring my vision in to the realm of reality.

Which leads us to this next piece. I know there looks to be no real uniform to the piece. That was the intention. I also know that the armor and the clothing of my Goddess looks to be from a bunch of different warrior cultures. I see bits of Norse, samurai, Roman, and medieval pieces mixed in. I have no idea what it all means. It part of the reason I can’t pin down who my Goddess is supposed to be. Is she even a mythical, ancient deity or is she my inner self? I am still trying to unpack it all for myself. When I figure it all out I’ll make sure to tell you guys as well.

After finishing it in the with my usual medium I decided to add some more “pazzaz” with some Photoshop edits. Geezz, that took way too long for my taste. The struggle of going AWOL for a long time and then jumping back on the horse is way worse than I thought it was going to be. The struggle bus loves to run me over when I least expect it.

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And then I could not choose which version I liked better to become the final product. So I left it up to my followers on my IG. In the end the people wanted the one with the black effect. But I am still unsure. What do you guys think?

That my friends concludes this tale. I have 4 more Quarantine Challenges left! (And who knows how long I’ll be out of work due to COVID-19.😭) I actually have a few more project ideas in the works as well. I promise I am not making a mountain out of a mole hill. Pinky-promise! I am also going to be updating my website with new stuff! I also have some personal entries being planned to update you on my future goals and adventures. So join my Crew on all my platforms to keep in the loop!

Until next time,

Captain Suzanna ⭐