Entry 15: What a Process!

Hey Crew!

My oh my, things have not been slowing down, huh? Does anyone else feel as though it has been years instead of just 6 months into this year? ‘Cause I feel like I have lived a lifetime already and I am in another reincarnations lifetime. This is bananas. I know I have no certain return date for work or anything going back to some sort of “normal” any time soon. And everyone is holding their collective breathe for this second wave that is bound to hit us hard. We are in the middle of history repeating itself, but most of the people that are in charge are refusing to see it. And I think that is the scariest part of it all. Please listen up, remember to take care of yourself. Remember unplug for a moment. Remember to not burn yourself out. Please use this time to grow. Use this time to learn something new. Use this time to unlearn something toxic. Use this time to find yourself. Please remember you are not alone, you are loved, and you can grow. I’m going to try my damnest to be that calm oasis for you. I’ve got your back. I promise.

Quarantine Challenge Project #12- Re-do: Dragon

I made this back in September of 2010. 10 years ago. How did I get into art school again? I’m so funny, I know. I am not sure where I was trying to go with this. It kind of looks like a cross between a snake and a bug. And that position of the head…. Like what?? Any sort of improvement will do wonders for it.

I started with some research on dragons. I looked at a bunch of pieces that other artists have made of dragons. I looked at historical and modern interpretations of the mythical creature. And although I saw some wonderful and creative pieces, nothing was sparking interest for me. So I started to look to actual nature. That is when I knew that I was going to hit the jackpot. I came across this Peruvian Dragon snake that was the perfect head, and then I used the body of a Monitor lizard, and the wings of a bat. And it looks a little like this:

I have figured out how to push my work to another level. I am really good at drawing what I can see. But somehow when I try to draw what I see in my mind it turns out to be dumpster fire. So I have found away around it. I create this kind of chimera like image of something that shows me what I truly want to create. The one thing I want to express to just budding artists out there is that you are only as good as your references. That can be anything from books, to life experiences, to internet image searches. And then the next lesson that you need to learn is PRACTICE, PRACTICE, and patience.

After I have a solid drawing, I start the illustration process. And I am exploring markers as a medium. I have subscriptions to Art Snack and SketchBox monthly boxes. Because of these boxes I have been trying lots of new mediums and techniques that I would have never tried otherwise. So far, I have found a new love with alcohol based markers. I’ve been wanting to do a full illustration with markers for a while, but I haven’t had the color range that I would like. So I purchased a ARTEZA EverBlend marker set. I don’t have the funds to get more of the Copic or Tombow markers that I love so much, so I got a good budget friendly brand. I can promise you that these ARTEZA markers are the bee’s knees. I am glad I got them to learn how to really use markers and just play with a new medium.

I am really proud of how this turned out! You can so see how there is a massive jump in skill in 10 years. Sweet Neptune.

And that marks the end of QCP #12. We’ve got only 2 more project left in this series if you can believe it! And this has been an incredible journey. However, this does not mean the end for us! I have a whole bunch of new projects lined up for us. So don’t go anywhere! In the next post, I am going to be talking about what the future is going to be looking like for our life on these Artist Seas. So I suggest to like, follow, comment, and subscribe to never miss a beat. Let’s set sail!

Until Next Time,

Captain Suzanna 🌙

Entry 11: F is for Failure, and that is OK.

Hey Crew!

How has everyone been doing since the last time we spoke? I have a feeling some of you have started to go back to work and some of you are in limbo with the state of things. I just want to remind you that you are not alone. Please reach out to friends, family, or even me if you are feeling lost or just need a reminder that there is light at the end of the tunnel. I will do my best to keep giving you something to look forward to and something to lighten your spirits. I am still working on getting some sort of schedule going, but you know me, I loose track of time and my head very easily. But I will always be around. We’ve got this!

Let’s just jump into this project that I have been working on.

Just to recap, during this pandemic I have been forcing myself to work on personal challenges. As of this post I have done 8 out of the 14 original challenges. I have also been doing other little projects here and there, but that is besides the point. Recently, I have started to film my process and my work flow. It has definitely added another level to my career as well as a HUGE learning curve with film making. (Just out of curiosity, if anyone else is a film editor, what programs would you recommend? I am finding it incredibly difficult to work with the basic program that I have. Maybe I need more practice, but I feel as though there is an easier way.)

With this latest project I tackled the Night/Day challenge. At first I had an idea to do like a butterfly for day and a moth for night and try to cleaver with symbolism. During my research phase, I could not for the life of me figure out which 2 I would choose. The more I learned about the different types of butterflies and moths the more I was hitting a brick wall. But I pushed through and chose a monarch butterfly and a luna moth. I wanted to freshen up with my digital art skills and try to make a cool vector piece. But I ran into some terrible luck and found out my drawing tablet kicked the bucket. So it became 100x harder. Since I am a lefty it is incredibly hard to draw with a mouse. Things were just not working out for me. I was trying to use a lot of pre-programmed effects and sketching tools to try to make it work. It was a nightmare. And I failed.

There are just problems with the composition, the pattern, colors and the visual feeling of it. I worked on this for 2 solid days to get this mess. And instead of throwing in the towel and crawling under a rock, like I would have done, I embraced it. It sounds a lot easier than it is. I am my own worse critic. I know how to tear my self apart and make myself lose faith. There is a lot of things to unpack there, but this is not the time. (Maybe in another post, if people want it.) I had to come up with a new idea. To push past this failure. I need to learn from it.

I went Back to my Roots.

I came up with some sketches and found some really good reference photos and got to work.

I was still going to add in the butterfly and moth idea come Hell or high water. So I got to thinking about Mother Earth and day and night and flowers. I was trying to play with the opposites. Like the monarch butterfly is the most well know butterfly (at least in North America) and the luna moth is the most well know moth. Then I knew I had to add a sunflower for day, cause why not? And I had to do some research on flowers that bloom at night and the moonflower was perfect. I am not sure many people know about this flower, (I know I had no clue) so here are some basic facts:

Moonflowers can add their incredible beauty and powerful fragrance to a night garden. Moonflower plants have large, beautiful, heart-shaped leaves growing on huge, robust vines that need a large trellis to support them. The iridescent white, trumpet-shaped flowers are around 6 inches long and 3 to 6 inches wide. These spectacular flowers unfurl from cone-shaped buds as the sun goes down and on some cloudy days. Moonflower plants are perfect to grow in an outdoor eating area or near a bedroom window, where their fragrance can sweeten the night air.
https://www.thespruce.com/growing-moon-flower-in-containers-4125231

Once I got my reference photos and some background information, I was ready to take the plunge. At first things went smoothly. And then my brain decided to think we knew how to make it look like stain-glass. And things went side-ways.

Should have stopped here

So as you can see from this video, things were great. I felt like it really came together and it was 100x better than the digital trial.

The Mistake

I was having a hard time with my camera and it missed whole sections of work and I was tired and just wanted to get it done in one sitting. And in the fog of crazy I thought I knew how to make it look like a freaking stain-glass piece. Like I told myself that I just need to cut it up and add some sort of boarder around the pieces and BAM it is done! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH….. Pfft, I had NO idea what I was doing.

Mistakes were made

This is the reason I should go to bed early. My brain steered me wrong. And then I tried to save it. It was ok.

The point I am trying to make is that I failed and that was ok.

I am not going to be able to smash all the levels at the same time. I have to do some grinding and practice my craft. Even though I have a degree and I have had some success, I still need to be humbled. If I didn’t fail, what would the point be? Nothing in life is just handed to you. (And no I am not getting into a class debate. Save that for another creator, thank you.) You have to learn to love your mistakes as well. You have to learn to accept and move forward. Trust me, it has taken me years to get to this point. I know it is so hard to see all the perfect influencers or friends/family/peers or just random people out there on the web or in real life. I 1000% get the struggle of trying to see yourself mixed in with those people. It is disheartening and a real obstacle for people to over come. I couldn’t compare with them in my mind. But I am here to tell you that I am like you and I make mistakes. I promise to become that person that is real. That shows the ups and downs. And not to sugar coat it. I want to be that person that make you feel welcomed and to know you are not alone. I know I need that kind of role model and peer to know that I am here and I do belong. Because we do belong, no matter what.

So please join me and my adeventures. Let’s start this movement. Let’s start saying Failure is ok too. #FailureisOK2

Until next time,

Suzanna ❤

Entry 10: Welp, the world is in chaos; what to do with the time?

Howdy Crew!

It has been a minute since your old Captain has given any sort of sign of life. A lot has happened in the time that I haven’t been around and I don’t even know where to start. Forgive your Captain for her lack of organization and forgetfulness. I am going to prove that this old sea dog is here to stay and I’m going to be making a difference.

In other news, how are you all doing? At this point in time the world seems a little chaotic. No matter where you are in the world or what you do for a living, I want to say I hope you are safe and staying healthy. And to all the essential workers out there, you are the true heroes. I have lots of love and respect for you and the hell you are going through. I hope if you are exploring my site to have a moment of calm in this storm that it gives you a smile and a well deserved distraction. Thank you.

I am still trying to figure out how to explain my unexpected hiatus. I am going to make a post dedicated solely to my absence, but I just really wanted to get back into the swing of things. If you have any questions for me, please ask. I am hoping to be able to get everything out in the next few days. //Crosses figures and toes.// Plus I have been working on tons of new content and ideas, so don’t go anywhere!

Quarantine Challenge

So if you have been following me on my IG you know I have made myself a Quarantine Challenge project. I have been trying to force myself to not come out of this lock-down without something to show for it. I am getting better at being consistent and not being afraid of failure. But I have always wanted to film my artistic process. I don’t have quite enough confidence to voice over let alone be on camera. But this is a start. I defiantly have come a long way with my mental health and self esteem. Baby steps, right? So without further ado, Quarantine Challenge Project #7: Demon.

You might be wondering, why Cerberus? What does the Greek Mythology that anything to do with demons? First off, we are not talking about the three headed Guardian of the Underworld. I collect and research and obsess over a wide range of stuff. Everything thing from Hello Kitty to the occult. My sister once told me that my room looks like there are multiple people living in one space. So, I have a tarot deck for different demons made by a demonologist. Don’t freak out, the deck isn’t for summoning demons. I’m not skilled enough to work with any sort of negative energy. (If you would like to know more about my crazy obsessions or my belief system just message me; if it is in popular demand I’ll make sure to include it all in a future post.) Anyway, I pulled Cerberus out of the deck.

And then the research started. So the demonology book that came with the deck didn’t offer me as much of an insight into who, what, when, where, how and why. So a quick Google search with some keywords lead me to Donate’s Divine Comedy. In the 3rd circle of Hell Dante meets the guardian of those who are gluttonous. Dante says that the beast looks like the 3 headed hound, like that of the Greek Mythology. Hence why people get confused on what it looks like. But if you read more in the “Infernal Dictionary” by Jacques Auguste Simon Collin De Plancy, (what a mouthful, geezz) the demonologist, he describes Cerberus a little different. Jacques say that demon has the body of a raven and 3 different heads of dogs. He also says that Cerberus is one of the kinder demons that would rather teach you about grace and staying in your lane rather than torture you. But even other demonologist say that Cerberus, when summoned, will show up with the body of a man and a head of a raven. I kind of Frankenstein the lore together to give you my version of Cerberus.

These first 3 images is of my research and my rough sketches. I mixed what Dante and Jacques say about the lore. I gave Cerberus the body of a raven and the 3 hound heads, because it is totally bizarre and way out there and I thought this is what kind of chaos Hell would give to your brain. Think about it, under great torture and just what ever kind of Hell you can picture it will defiantly make you loose all sense of sense. Like you could be hearing colors and tasting sounds. So you are trying to figure out what this creature looks like so you can wrap your broken mind around it to make any sort of sense. Then I decided to take the 3rd Circle of Hell: Gluttony from Dante to give it some sort of “home”. Mud and filth and excrement just swallowing the damned and the constant rain of nasty, just sounded like so much fun. Not really though. I also decided to include some sort of demonic army from the demonologist. It just felt right to me.

I like I might have unconsciously made the hounds look like my sister’s pup. Whoops.

For the Final piece, I have been really into blocking out large areas with watercolor and making the finer details with markers and ink. I think it turned out really well. I forgot to tell you about the flag! So through my research scholars have deemed this the symbol of Cerberus, and I just had to include it somewhere. What do you think of how it turned out?

Like I said earlier, I’ve always wanted to film my work. I have always been to nervous and shy about my work being out there in the universe that I never thought that I had the skill to do so. But I have a “take no prisoners” attitude right now and just dived right in. Hell, I even made a YouTube Channel for my work. I am slowly teaching myself how to film and edit. It is definitely a learning curve that I am so pumped for. I have more Quarantine Challenge Projects in the works and new opportunities for more videos. So buckle up kiddos we are going on an adventure!

All and all, I am excited for this new Chapter in life. I am so glad you are all going on this journey with me. “The more the merrier,” they always say. At the end of this post there are my Social Media links. Please make sure to follow me to stay up to date. Thanks a bunch! I’m so ready for all of this, are you?

Until next time,

Captain Suzanna